during a past dental appointment, my dentist decided to pull out my last baby tooth.

'you don't need to be numbed' he said


When i was born, i was, like many babies that age, pigeon toed and bow legged. since it is a common thing, i guess my parents didn't feel the need to do anything to fix my deformities. it wasn't until years later, when at a doctors appointment we were examining an x-ray of my legs that the doctor expressed his surprise of just how straight my bones were without the skin, because when covered they sure looked bent. ever since that time i have been extremely self-conscious of the fact that i can't touch my knees together when standing straight.
we travel to california a lot to visit family and on one occasion, i looked at some childhood pictures of my grandma and saw my very own bow-legs plastered onto her body. after talking to her she reassured me that although i may have inherited her bones, i didn't get her enormous feet. that wasn't too comforting, but now that i had figured out where these alien extremities came from, i was consoled for the time being.
having come from regular sized (if not smaller then average) parents, i assumed my height was a mere genetic trait. but as i discovered my strangely shaped limbs, and the fact that my syblings were beginning to gain on me, the realization hit me that if it weren't for my handicap, i would probably be around 6'5" as opposed to the 5'2" that i'm stuck at.
i hit teen years and during one of my soccer games received a sudden burst of speed. these became more and more common until i developed into a pretty fast runner. at one point i asked my mom where i got this new found trait, and she said it probably came from my dad. i looked over at my father who was wearing particularly high cut shorts at the time, and i was amazed to discover that i had, not my grandma's legs, but an exact replica of my begetter's lower torso.
i continued on with life, being continually quietly conscious of myself. although i was always aware of the things attached to me, i had finally gotten over the initial shock of the whole thing. my sense of security was short-lived though. at one social event a nurse in the making asked,
"did you skip the crawling stage?"
"why, no, i didn't" i replied.
"well my professor was talking the other day about children who just go from rolling to walking. he said this causes some hip malfunction, and gives you bow-legs!"
i'm afraid the damn things will continue to haunt me for the rest of my life.